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Katie Bowman's LiveJournal:
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| Wednesday, February 24th, 2010 | | 4:23 pm |
| | Tuesday, January 26th, 2010 | | 4:04 pm |
"I'm not feeling so bold.
Can't you see I don't wanna grow old?
And my photograph's an epitaph of parody.
I don't wanna be me."Sssooo.... I'm still in my apartment. I'm staying here alone now, because Rhys decided that he enjoyed his drugs more than being here with him. So I kicked his lazy, freeloading, drug addicted ass out. :) It was quite enlightening. I absolutely freakin' adore my apartment. I haven't been homesick from my mom's at all. Not even when I moved in. It definitely feels like my own home. It's cozy, and I don't have any complaints. Remember when I said that Glenn was pushing and pulling me in every direction? Well.. that went away for a little while, came back, then it was weird. Well... In December (the 12th of December, ironically enough), he texts me, and tells me to meet him outside my apartment. Out of nowhere. Sorta... He had texted me a week or so before that telling me it was way too much energy to stay mad for no reason, and that he wanted to be my friend again. I agreed. To be honest.. I missed him. A lot. So, I did. I went outside, in the bitter cold, and waited for him. He drove up and stopped right in front of me. Came out, and said 'hi' with a big smile. I smiled back and said 'hey'. We talked for a good half hour, even though he had to get home. We laughed, we remembered, we made fun of each other. It was how it always was with him. The spark came back. It was in both our eyes, and we couldn't deny it. When he said he had to go, my heart sank, as usual. I hate watching him leave. He asked me for a hug, and I gave him the look that always told him it was a stupid question. He pulled me in, and didn't let go. I pulled away just enough to be able to look him in the eyes. We didn't break eye contact for what felt like forever. I had to look down.. His eyes were pulling me in for what I wasn't yet ready for. That night, and many after, he spoke words to me that I needed to hear. I needed to hear them for months. He said he missed me, he told me how beautiful I am, how bad he needed me, wanted me, for the rest of his days. He told me he had learned the consequences of his ways, and felt badly about what he did. It was so hard for me not to believe him. He was so sincere about it. But.. I had no reason not to believe him. He even told me to take my time, because he didn't care how long it took. He wasn't going anywhere. I went to the Winter Solstice Celebration with him and his family. We have so many memories at that church. I was bombarded with emotions. All so good. His mom even came up and gave me a hug, just how she always did- with that big smile of her's. She was wearing the necklace I gave her for her birthday the past summer. Him and I sat in the back row, where none of the lights were. If there was ever a dark corner, we'd find it. Every time. His sister sat on the other side of him. She usually did that. It was so good to see her too. It had been a while. During that celebration, he dropped his candle close to me on the floor, when he came up from picking it up he brushed against me, and said it was just an excuse to get close to me. I then told him that he didn't need an excuse. And we smiled. There was soup for people to eat after wards. We sat with some people we didn't know. He grabbed my hand under the table- resting on my thigh, and held it so strongly. It felt so gentle at the same time. I could feel my cheeks getting warm and red. I smiled under my breath. Heart pounding. When we parted that evening, he kissed me and told me he loved me. I thought I was going to collapse right there. So.. from that point on, I became his. We haven't put a label on it, but I don't think neither of us want to. He gave me the most amazing Christmas present. He got me a silver necklace with blue tourmaline and earrings with both our birthstones in them. He also spent all of Christmas eve with me. Along with New Years eve. Every chance he gets he comes to visit. He even surprised me on my birthday. I couldn't ask for more. We both know we're dedicated to each other, and I believe that's all we need. I don't want anyone else, and neither does he. He is the love of my life, and will always have my heart. He's perfect. | | Thursday, October 22nd, 2009 | | 12:23 am |
"it reminds me of.. old people." -Rhys
yup, that boy is a keeper. we're moving into an apartment this week. bar harbor. holy EXCITED! i can't wait. we've already started moving in a few things. he's a good shit, that one. :) still haven't seen Jen, and it's very bad. :( possibly this weekend? if not, definitely during next week. i refuse to go much longer. i need my Jen fix. for cereal. but.. for now, i need to go pack the rest of my stuff and try and get some sleep. WOO! Current Mood:  accomplished | | Friday, October 9th, 2009 | | 9:08 pm |
"if there's shit on your mustache, the whole world stinks." -Rhae
i really love that woman. haha. it's been interesting.. to say the very least. worked all summer. had a blast for most of it. flew for the first time with Murph. to maryland.. to meet Mickey.. yeah. =/ anyway. made new friends, and lost even more. such is life, right? told Glenn off, now he's pulling and pushing me in every direction, and he doesn't even know it. well.. not many people do. i'm with Rhys. WHAT?!?! yeah.. it still hasn't hit ME yet. getting a tattoo in four days. moving out. into an apartment? in bar harbor? yes, please. driving now. (oh, they grow up so fast) life.. holy shit. it really slapped me right in the kisser this year. in more ways than one. it's so funny how things can change so quickly. now.. Jen. my god. Jen. i've honestly never loved an individual so much in my entire life. hands down. she is my best friend, and i miss her SO fucking much. i actually cry quite often if i hear a song that reminds me of her. oh the shit we've been through.. how did we make it? she means more to me than any person on this planet. i would die for her. i never want her out of my life. she IS my life. and i love her. i haven't seen her in two solid months. i'm losing it. "It's crazy how the scent of the air can take you back to a place you haven't been in years.."
-Me Current Mood:  artistic | | Tuesday, June 16th, 2009 | | 7:18 pm |
| | Tuesday, March 31st, 2009 | | 4:30 pm |
unknown authors.
"It's a weird tingling sensation in my fingers which occurs moments before my emotions flood over. Like my senses are telling me I'm about to lose it. I'm just thankful for the warning, no matter how much it hurts."
"All I want to do now is run now.
Maybe if I could just run hard enough or fast enough
my breathing could out weigh the pain.
Maybe if I ran I'd actually get somewhere.
But the only place I'll ever get is right back were I started from."
it's been a while.. hasn't it?
haven't forgotten.
just... you know.
glenn left me.
came back.
it's been great.. but,
problems again.
mrs. cullens saved me.
more than once.
jen and i aren't friends.
long story..
family is driving me absolutely insane.
have a counselor.
she's incredible.
prom?
can't wait.
down the the dumps today though...
we'll see how it all unravels.
:/ Current Mood:  i.. don't know.. | | Tuesday, November 18th, 2008 | | 8:12 pm |
"but there's nothing there, so i obviously wasn't touching myself." -mr. lurvey
so... basically i've been too lazy to update this because i've been writing everything about my life in my journal for creative writing. i really don't feel like repeating myself. that's just lame. glenn and i had our 1 year anniversary a month and six days ago. it was the most amazing day we've had together. and it still continues to get better. to this day, i can't find a damn thing i don't like about him. he's still perfect in my eyes, and i can't get enough of him. i'm so in love with him. we went to la bella vitas for dinner that night. it was the best food i've had in a long time. they're not expensive, but the quality of everything is freakin' five star i swear. it's very romantic. i love it there. and he's very sweet. i gave him his presents, the engraved picture frame, the ring, and the t-shirt with our song on it, and he loved them all. i was so pleased to see his face light up. it was awesome. my present still hasn't come yet, but i don't care. i don't need one from him. just being with him that night was enough. he's amazing. ummm... i've spent a lot of time with him. we went to boston together. jen spent the night the night before so we could give her a ride. it was a lot of fun in boston. we saw penguins and shopped around for hours. it was awesome. glenn bought me a big stuffed penguin. i sleep with it every night. =] school has been fine. made honor roll. woot. i absolutely hate mrs. VD. she's driving me insane, and i don't know how much more i can put up with. she's a terrible teacher, and she's a bitch. i can't stand her. i gave blood last week. they actually let me this time. haha. glenn was right by my side the whole time too. that was nice. =] i got an ipod. cheah man. the new nano. it's freakin' cool. had a huge blow out with murph and ashleigh, but we're okay now. not exactly good friends. but we're not bitchy towards each other. jen is my closest friend by far. she's my fave. yeah... i don't really know exactly what else has happened. little things. obviously not important enough to remember. heh. yeah. i'll update again eventually. kay bye. | | Monday, September 29th, 2008 | | 7:22 pm |
a lot has happened. holy crap. wish i could remember it all. school is easy..ish. mostly. spending SO MUCH great time with glenn. whenever i doubt it could get better with him, it instantly does. i fall more and more in love with him just about everyday. i've never experienced this before. it's an amazing feeling. he surprises me so much, and half the time he doesn't even know it. he gave me a beautiful necklace with my birthstone in the shape of a heart. i don't know if i mentioned that, but it's georgous. three more days until his birthday. i'm definitely more excited than he is. =] =] =] then it's a week and a half until our 1 year. damn i can't wait. work hasn't been too bad. aj's mom died, and i haven't seen him since. i'll be there tomorrow, then hanscom's on wednesday, glenn's thursday, jen's friday, and tonight wal mart. haha. and nap time. =] i'm writing this as i'm in creative writing, but i'll post it when i get home. i just don't have enough time for anything. once i stop working, i'll be all set. i'm tied in with the National Art Honor Society, work, glenn, friends, sleep, homework, school. and i love every minute of it. ..... ... almost. we're watching the Ok Go video. wow. i'm done. bye. | | Thursday, September 11th, 2008 | | 4:30 pm |
mmkay.. i've worked. i've had school. i've spent some time with glenn, and some with jen. i had a yelling fight with matt rankin. but then again... who hasn't? i asked a kit why he was being grumpy, and he had a fit.. that he wasn't, but in turn was actually being grumpy. hehe. i just wont take any shit this year. people need to lighten up. yeah.. so. tomorrow is mine and glenn's 11 month mark. i'm pretty excited. =D i'll hopefully be going to his house tomorrow. i got my new phone. it's smexy. um.. both of us are signed up for the boston trip, and it's all paid for. official. first ones on the list because she gave us our slips early, because she loves us. hehe. i'm at work now, so i'mma go. bye. | | Thursday, September 4th, 2008 | | 4:53 pm |
boob lube.
went to the fair with glenn and his family. that was the most fun fair i have EVER been to. it was amazing. i got a whole bunch of stuff, and glenn got me a beautiful ring with my birthstone. =] it was awfully sweet. started school. senior english, creative writing, intro to tech (i have with glenn. =D), and then i have art II. i like my teachers, and they're easy classes. not too bad for first semester. desi gray died last night. hit by a car. she was in glenn's class. and she's glen gray's little sister. it hit WAY too close to home. i'm really having a hard time with it, and it seems like no one else understands why, other than murph, glenn, ashleigh, and jen. it's weird. i wrote about it in our half hour journal time in creative writing. it's been a weird day. i'm at the clock store now. i get out at 6:30. blehhh... i ordered a new tracfone. it's black and it's a picture phone. so i can send a receive pictures. it also comes with a free double minutes card. hell yeah. i'm pretty excited. i get it saturday. woot. mmkay... homework is done. now i'mma work.. kinda. bye. Current Mood:  weird | | Thursday, August 28th, 2008 | | 5:10 pm |
| | 4:58 pm |
it's been a while, once again. working... more and more. buying clothing, new phones, new shoes, and random stuff for glenn. =] i'm also reading the twilight series. it's not as bad as i thought. i was wondering why everyone wanted an edward.. but now i don't care, because i have my own. ♥ soooo... i got jen into belly dance. finally. and she likes it. toby and i are going to see what we can do to keep her in. despite what her mom wants. whether it be a money issue, or transportation. i don't care. school starts tuesday. and i'll still work after school. and weekends.... ugh. but the money is worth it. for kinda of drama. not really... in my life anyway. both murph and evans called. random. on the same day. but i still can't accept change, so what/who may be bad for me in the end, i can't quite let go yet. i just don't have it in me. i love them both. and for this year, at least, i'll stick with the same 'ol crap. yup. i've never felt so close to glenn as i have been lately. coming up on 11 months. crazy. but i love every minute of it. he's more than perfect, and continues to amaze me. god i love him... i love him so damn much. on that loving note. i'm gonna get back to work, and see if glenn is on facebook yet. so he can entertain me while i wait on people who want to buy clocks.. woo. day off tomorrow.. can't wait. sleep, fair with glenn and his family, then a family BBQ at his grandparents'.. i think. where else would it be? =] kay. bye. Current Mood: bored | | Tuesday, August 19th, 2008 | | 4:57 pm |
so. working. my sister got married. glenn almost wasn't able to make it. but he did. and i couldn't have been happier. it was a lot of fun. =] soo.... work. yeah. money. the whole bit. i ordered some more clothing. shirts. and they're awesome. i'mma get some more. so. i'm working now. yeah. asldkhas. bye. p.s.
i'm so in love with glenn. my feelings just don't stop getting stronger.
he's the most amazing guy i could ever ask for.
this could really be it.
i love him more than i've ever loved anyone in my entire life.
♥ Current Mood:  loved | | Tuesday, August 12th, 2008 | | 10:20 pm |
| | 10:10 pm |
.♥. 10 months .♥.
for real? whoa.he got me two little penguins. and they're mighty cute. he took me to the movies. and... it was fun. =] he got me coffeeeeeee...... heh. i got him a nice card, and minutes for his phone. apparently i have something else coming in the mail... oh doh. i've worked. spent time with him. =] i shopped a whole lot. got a bunch of clothes. iiii..... can't remember what else. so yeah. bed time. =] byebye. Current Mood:  chipper | | Friday, August 8th, 2008 | | 4:34 pm |
it be my favorite number day. 8*8*08
fo sho. glenn and i took the old bed out of my room on monday. so i have an ass load of space. i even changed a bunch of stuff around. it looks completely different. i got a neon pink panther clock from here, i ordered a chair and a new poster, and i got a freakin' trash can and a coat rack. i even got new sheets and a comforter for my bed. my room is amazing. and you're jealous. things with glenn couldn't be better. his kiss still makes me weak at the knees, and the site of him still gives me butterflies. he's the perfect guy. =] =] almost 10 months. i can't wait. i have so much money. and i don't know what the hell to do with it all. it's such a good feeling. i love it, and don't ever want it to go away. so i think i'm gonna get a small part time job for the winter. who knows. i'll see what happens. i've hung out with robert, jen, and... yeah. did i mention we all went to the movies? probably. i'm still in love with the joker, by the way. yeahhhh. um.. that's it? don't know. but bye. Current Mood:  giddy | | Sunday, August 3rd, 2008 | | 9:54 pm |
"hello my dear, i need to talk to mr. sunshine." -evan. AJ's friend. haha.
AJ... mr. sunshine? i cracked up. anyway. i really like the bat man movie. i went with glenn, murph, shawn, and robert. it was mighty fun. =] =] the joker is AMAZING. "why so serious?"i love him. i've worked. seen glenn. been through some thunder storms. =] got $50 from taking care of the animals for the weekend. sweetnesssss. yeah. i'm going to treat myself with my money soon hopefully. get shome shtuff. yup. bye. Current Mood:  jubilant | | Thursday, July 31st, 2008 | | 5:01 pm |
too much. too little. it's never really correct.
working. spending as much time as i can find with glenn, and friends. none for just me. it's impossible. i gave up trying. racking up the money is worth it. i'm liking the extra cash from tips, and being able to keep hundreds of money in my account. it's lllooooovvvvvvvveeeeelllllyyyyyy. =] =] i got toby a pair of earrings for her birthday, if i didn't already mention it. she LOVED them. and couldn't believe i did that for her. i wrote her a nice card too. i got a hug. haha. saw robert!!! i missed him. and murph. and of course jen. finally. i need to spend an entire week with her. i miss her like crazy. i need her funny. =[ i'm at get clocked right now. he's not here. i have to pee. damn.... yeah. not too much other exciting things going on. i'm never home. i'm always working. i go to bed as soon as i get home. every night. ughhh. only one day off. but it's okay. money. money. money. yeah. i'm done in two hours. then sleep. yay. byebye. | | Tuesday, July 22nd, 2008 | | 7:09 pm |
i'm... at work, and shouldn't be doing this. but he's not here, so whatever.
long story short, i'm working two jobs and simply don't have time to breathe, let alone update this everyday. or.. every 5 days. whatever. what's been going on? earning an ass load of money working so much, spending time with glenn and his family, hitching rides home from hanscom's with rhys randomly, and trying to find time for pleasing everyone around me, with forgetting about myself, and what i need. sound like fun? you have no idea. it actually isn't all that bad. believe it or not. i have fake nails, the kind that if they break off, your actual nail is going with it. ouch. but i should be fine. i got them at my sister's bridal shower, then i took care of avery and garrett for most of the night. pretty cool. i got my penguin watch from here, and he took $3 off, and didn't charge tax. i got about $100 in tips at the hotel. no complaints there. i got my checks and debit card in the mail. exciting. ummmm....... we got new shirts to wear here. cool, eh? yeah. so i miss my friends, especially jen, because she keeps me going with her funnies. i miss her bunches, and need to see her, so hopefully i will this weekend, if i have a day off. =/ yeah. so i'll end with a conversation between AJ and i. "i have to go across the street for an hour or so. do you want water, or a soda, or something?" -AJ
"nah, i'll be fine, thanks though." -me
"do you want a cookie?" -AJ
"*while laughing* um.. no. i'm set." -me
"are you sure you don't want a cookie? because i can get you a cookie." -AJ
"no AJ, i'm fine. thanks." -me
he's a good egg. | | Wednesday, July 16th, 2008 | | 4:17 pm |
this will be short. i don't have enough time for it anymore.
ok, so sunday: went to glenn's. and belly dance. =] monday: i started my new job. i LOVE it there. i work with two old women. one is a pain, but i've learned a lot from her, and the other is a hoot. she's so funny. i'll be doing that mon-fri. glenn came over. we went swimming and spent time together. it was exciting. =] yesterday: worked at hanscom's. then went to bar harbor and hung out with angel and matt. then i called and talked to glenn for a little while. it was so good to hear his voice. =] i sat in the green with shawn a. then corey and lizzy showed up. i went to work at 3. stayed until 7. and saw jen in the process. came home, called glenn, watched tv, bathed, and went to bed. today: glenn, clora, mairi, and toby all showed up at hanscom's today to clean marydean's house for her. glenn scared the crap out of me, he said something to me when he got there while i was making a bed, and i wasn't expecting it at all. but it was funny. once i was done with everything, i hopped in the pool and we swam around for a while. then we went back to his house and spent some time together. now i'm home. i'm going to a free belly dance class with toby and the girls tonight. it's supposed to be basic and easy, so i can get more comfortable. i get tips from the people who leave the rooms at hanscom's. it's really nice. my first day i got $17, yesterday $7, and today $23. not too bad. i certainly don't mind. ok. so i'mma go. byebye. Current Mood:  tired |
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